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How Can You Tell If You’re Good in Bed?

If you’re sexually active, then it’s probably pretty safe to assume you hope you’re good in bed. After all, everyone wants to be the kind of person who leaves a lover hungry for more and stays on a person’s mind long after an encounter is over. There are many people out there who aren’t so hot at sex, though, and it’s not like most partners are going to tell someone if that’s the case.

So, how can you tell whether you’re really the sexual dynamo you hope you are? It’s easier than you think. You just have to know how to go about looking for answers. Here’s a closer look at how you can tell whether you’re knocking it out of the park in the bedroom in general.

You’re super confident.

This is one thing every person who’s excellent in bed has in common. They’re confident to the bone. They also know that being great in bed isn’t necessarily about having a flawless gym body or being model-gorgeous. It’s about never second-guessing yourself and always going into sex, assuming you’re going to be awesome.

The interesting thing about confidence is that when you believe in your own abilities, other people tend to believe in them, too. Work on your body image and any hang-ups you may have about your physique or about sex. Cultivate a healthy sense of self-love. You’ll be where you want to be before you know it.

You’re a great communicator.

People who are good in bed genuinely enjoy sex. They love establishing that connection with another person, and they can’t get enough of how good sex feels. They not only know what they like in bed, but they’re comfortable communicating it to their partner. They understand that excellent communication is a two-way street, as well, so they’re just as terrific at listening to their lovers.

If you don’t already know your way around your body and understand what types of stimulation bring you the most pleasure, it’s time to find out. Buy an outstanding quality vibrator, and spend some time experimenting. Then get vocal and let your partner know exactly how you like it.

You love everything about sex from start to finish.

As incredible as a seriously toe-curling orgasm can be, great sex is about more than just that big finish. People who are great in bed savor every step of the journey along the way. They love the tension that comes with craving someone and flirting up a storm. They love undressing themselves and their lover. They love basking in the glow of the things they’ve just done when it’s all over, as well.

People who are great lays aren’t in any rush to reach the finish line. They take their time and appreciate every little grunt, groan, caress, and kiss along the way. They like long, lush marathon love sessions, quickies, and everything in between, as well.

You love making your partner feel good.

While enjoying sex yourself and making sure you walk away satisfied is essential, so is paying attention to your partner. People who are fantastic in bed go out of their way to learn what does it for the other person. They also understand that no two people or bodies are exactly alike, so they don’t simply assume that what worked for their ex will get the job done for someone new.

Great sex partners are also respectful of their partners’ boundaries. They care about the other person’s feelings and are loving and patient. They’re considerate when they’re not in the mood or just not into something new they may have tried. They never force the issue or try to pressure someone into doing something they don’t want.

You’re open to trying new things.

People who are good in bed are masters of variety, and they know how important it is to keep things fresh in the bedroom. They’re always open to trying new things or thinking outside the box, whether that means exploring lots of new positions, roleplaying, or trying out new sex toys together every once in a while.

Sexual dynamos don’t just love sex. They’re curious about it and always looking for ways to make it even better. So, don’t let yourself get set in your ways and stick with the same old things just because they work. Share fantasies with your partner and encourage them to share, as well. Alternate between planning for luxurious love sessions and being spontaneous. Experiment with new positions, locations, and techniques.

Although it’s never possible to be 100 percent certain that you’re great in bed, especially when “good in bed” is such a relative concept anyway, you’re on the right track if you’re genuinely in love with sex. Never stop looking for ways to love it even more. You’ll be better for it.

The Dos and Don’ts of Taking a New Partner to Bed

If there’s one experience that can be nearly as terrifying as it is exhilarating, it’s going to bed with someone new. On the one hand, you’re thrilled that it’s finally time to take things to the next level. But on the other, you’re worried things won’t go as smoothly as you hope. Then, even casual sex requires a certain degree of trust that isn’t always easy to give.

Thankfully, while sex with a brand new partner isn’t always uncomplicated, it doesn’t have to be rocket science either. Here are a few dos and don’ts to keep in mind the next time you’re ready to get horizontal with someone new. Your nerves will be history in no time.

DO check your expectations at the door.

When your pants are really on fire for someone, in particular, it can be hard not to get your hopes up when it’s finally time to get horizontal together. You want to keep your expectations in check, though, even if your chemistry is incredible. Sometimes sex is mind-blowing right from day one, but often, it takes time for things to click with someone new.

DON’T be overly adventurous right away.

A lot of people see a romp with someone new as a golden opportunity to really pull out all the stops, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But that needs to be an approach that feels comfortable for both of you. A first love session isn’t necessarily the best time to flex by whipping out your copy of the Kama Sutra or going from zero to hardcore BDSM in an instant. Start with the basics. If that goes well, there’s plenty of time to bust out your signature moves in the future.

DO bring a toothbrush with you.

Or a tin of mints or a travel-sized bottle of mouthwash. You get the picture. Bad breath has a way of rearing its ugly head right when it’s least convenient. If you come fully prepared, you’ll be able to take action if you’re concerned there was too much garlic in the pasta you ordered at dinner. You’ll also be ready to rock first thing in the morning if things go well enough to lead to a full-on sleepover.

DON’T forget the protection.

Contraception is everyone’s responsibility, so never assume that the other person will take care of it. Don’t assume even if they’ve told you they’d take care of it. If they don’t actually follow through, you’ll wind up having to interrupt your fun to make a condom run at best, and that’s hardly an ideal way to start a first lovemaking session. And while we’re on the topic of preparedness, it’s not a bad idea to bring along a travel bottle of condom-safe lube just in case, either.

DO keep things light and playful.

Remember, sex is supposed to be fun. However, it also happens to be a little messy and wild sometimes. Human bodies do things like making interesting noises at the worst possible times, so there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. In fact, laughing it off to show it’s no big deal is a much better reaction to a wayward fart or queef than getting nervous or trying to pretend that it never happened at all. Plus, a little laughter and playfulness often make the experience more fun, so relax, and try not to take things so seriously.

DON’T hesitate to speak up.

When you’re with someone new, you don’t yet have a road map to go by, but there’s a bright side to that. Finding out what turns someone on and watching them light up when you try it is great fun. That said, don’t be afraid to communicate, both verbally and nonverbally. Let your partner know when they’re doing something you love. Ask them how what you’re doing feels to them, as well. Everyone’s different when it comes to what does it for them, so when in doubt, ask.

DO forget about how you look.

Everyone has hang-ups about their body and looks, but don’t let yours ruin your good time with your new partner. Remember that if you’re in bed together, they’re already into what you have going on. It’s highly unlikely that they’ll notice or care about your alleged imperfections, so do yourself a favor and forget about them, too. Fixating too much on such things will only put a damper on your good time.

DON’T hyper-focus on orgasm.

No one’s saying you shouldn’t go after an orgasm or try to help your partner have one of their own. Just don’t make orgasm the be-all and end-all of your experience. Remember, it takes some time to find your rhythm and learn what gets you both there. Just relax, enjoy the ride, and embrace the orgasms with open arms if they do happen.

7 Sexy Resolutions For Every Woman’s List in 2021

If you’re like most women who make New Year’s resolutions every year, you tend to focus on doing less, as opposed to more. Some people vow to cut back on their drinking or make fewer fast-food runs. Others plan on watching less television or spending less time sitting around, wasting time in general. But doing more can be just rewarding and fulfilling.

This is especially the case for your intimate life, both with your partner (if you have one) and yourself. The following are just a few potential sexy resolutions that may help you upgrade your sexual satisfaction factor in a big way this year. Don’t be afraid to let your imagination run wild and come up with more.

1.      Treat yourself to new lingerie for your benefit.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with buying something sexy to slip into because you know it will drive your partner wild, but why leave yourself out of the equation? After all, it’s your body, and you’ll be the one wearing the items you pick. This year add something to your lingerie drawer because it makes you feel like a straight siren. Chances are, your partner will like it too, so it’s a win-win.

2.      Spend more time going solo.

Don’t make the mistake of assuming masturbation is only for people who aren’t in relationships. Solo sessions have a place in every woman’s life, whether she’s attached to someone else or not. They’re an incredible way to care for yourself, nurture your understanding of your body, and discover new sensations to enjoy. Treat yourself to a new luxury vibrator from a top manufacturer like FemmeFunn, and get 2021 started with a bang!

3.      Fall madly in love with your body.

Yes, even the parts you don’t like so much. The better your appreciation of your body, especially in a sexual context, the more satisfying your intimate life will be going forward. Self-consciousness can distract you from thoroughly enjoying yourself, especially when you’re with a partner. However, an unshakeable sense of comfort in one’s own skin can be a gamechanger. Make this the year you fall in love with your body and make peace with your imperfections.

4.      Check out female-directed porn.

Visual porn may or may not be your jam, but if it is, you really owe it to yourself to check out some woman-directed material this year. Porn from female directors tends to be more body-positive and a lot more realistic than what you’re used to seeing from male directors. It’s often more artistic and easier for female viewers to connect to, as well. Do yourself a favor, and see what’s out there this year. It’s hot and inspiring.

5.      Make speaking up in bed one of your sexy resolutions.

When it comes to partnered sex, communication is the key to getting what you want out of the experience, so don’t be shy about speaking up in 2021. The key to success here is to focus on the positive and ask for things that feel good instead of criticizing something that isn’t working as well. Tell your partner how good it would make you feel if they stroked you a certain way or how hot it would make you if they tried out a particular position. Your partner wants to please you, so they’ll likely be more than eager to oblige.

6.      Commit to having only genuine orgasms.

Yes, you read that right. Most women have faked it a time or two over the years, and it’s unlikely you’re any different. It’s well worth your while to graduate to having only real orgasms, though. If your partner isn’t stimulating you the way you need to have the orgasms you’re after, it’s time to open up the lines of communication. Otherwise, you’re only encouraging them to do more of what’s already not working, and neither of you truly wants that.

7.      Learn something new about sex.

Add a sex book to your collection, and read it cover to cover in 2021. Sign up for a good sex class, or opt for a self-led video course instead if you’re more of a self-starter. Not only is learning new things fun and enriching, but you might be surprised at just how many new techniques, tricks, and tips you pick up in the process. Go for more generalized coverage on the topic of sex, or focus on something specific you’d personally like to excel at – like blow jobs or rope-tying, to name just two examples. You’ll be glad you made an effort.

A brand new year is like a nice, clean slate you can make into whatever you want. After the never-ending weirdness that was 2020, you owe it to yourself to indulge in a few upgrades in 2021. Why not start with your sex life?

How to Build Your Body Confidence and Feel at Ease in Your Own Skin

Naturally, women today know that they should feel at ease in their own skin, regardless of what it looks like. Putting that thinking into practice can be challenging, though. Regardless of their size or shape, modern women are continually sent the message that they’re not good enough as they are.

Tuning out all the negativity feels impossible sometimes, especially when it seems like that’s all you hear, but it’s worth it. Nothing feels as good as self-acceptance and rampant self-love. Here’s how to build your sense of body-confidence and fall madly in love with who you are.

Focus on health, not looks.

What motivates your approach to eating, exercise, and physical self-care? A body-confident person with a healthy self-image always makes that call with proper health in mind. They eat to nourish themselves and exercise as a way to care for their body. It’s not about reaching or maintaining a particular weight.

Even if it’s hard, it’s time to stop focusing on the scale or how many inches your waist may have on it. Be good to your body instead. Feed it plenty of good quality foods – lean protein, whole grains, and fresh produce. Drink water like it’s your job, and go easy on the alcohol. Exercise by partaking in activities you enjoy and that make you feel alive. You’ll love the difference it makes.

Compliment yourself daily.

Body-confident women appreciate it when others pay them compliments, but they don’t wait around for it to happen. They pay themselves compliments first. Try it sometime, and work on making it a habit. Do it even if it feels silly at first, and do it every day. Remind yourself that these are true things you’re saying and that you deserve to hear them.

How you do this is up to you. Some women do enjoy looking at themselves in the mirror and paying themselves verbal compliments. However, using a journal to focus on what you like about yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally is just as effective.

Get to know yourself sexually.

Society still trains women to think of an orgasm (or sensual pleasure of any kind) as something a woman waits for her partner to give her. It should be something every woman knows she can give to herself anytime she’s in the mood and in whatever manner she chooses. Learning your way around your own body is the best way to know what types of touch you respond best to. That’s information you can then use to improve your sex life with your partner.

There’s nothing wrong with doing things the old-fashioned way with fingers alone, but a good vibrator is too good to miss out on. Treat yourself to a luxury vibrator you can count on to come through for you. Then have a blast taking your solo sessions to the next level.

Do things for yourself often.

Telling yourself you’re worth it is a great start when it comes to building solid body-confidence, but you shouldn’t stop at mere words. Confident women show their love for themselves with actions, as well. Go out of your way to be kind to yourself and treat yourself to things or activities that make you feel your best.

Need a breather from an over-hectic social life? Schedule a weekend alone to regroup and recuperate. Pour yourself a glass of wine and treat yourself to a long, hot bubble bath. Spend an entire Sunday morning on a luxury skincare routine. Treat yourself to a day at the spa or splurge on that gorgeous new pair of boots you’ve wanted since forever. You deserve it, and you’re worth it.

Style yourself for you.

If you’re like many women, you’re conditioned to think that looking good is something you do to impress other people and gain their approval. And it’s OK to enjoy turning a few heads because it feels good. Just don’t build your whole aesthetic around what you think other people want to see from you.

First of all, it’s impossible to please everyone. Second, no one else’s opinion matters more than your own. Style yourself according to what you think is beautiful. Wear clothes that make you feel amazing and that you feel express who you are to the rest of the world. That can mean dressing to the nines in heels, lots of makeup, and a fresh blowout every day, or it can mean going au naturel every day in jeans, a t-shirt, and a fresh face. It’s your life and your body, so you, do you!

The more you consciously practice body-positivity and self-love in your life, the easier it will become. Before you know it, loving yourself and treating yourself like the queen you are will be second nature. Try it and see!

Whisper-Quiet Vibrators: Your Ticket to a Naughtier Sex Life

If you’re like most modern ladies, you can’t even picture your intimate life without your trusty vibrator, the Delola, and with good reason. Whether you’re looking to elevate love play with your partner or flying solo for the immediate moment, vibrators have a way of taking things to the next level and beyond. There’s really only one drawback – that telltale buzz that ensures anyone even somewhat nearby knows precisely what you’re doing.

Of course, there’s nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to using a vibrator, but sometimes you want to guarantee your privacy. Making the switch to a luxury vibrator with a whisper-quiet motor can be a real game changer in this department. One experience is all it takes to make you wonder what took you so long.

Keep things private, even when your roommates are home.

Let’s face it. We’ve all been there. You’re in the mood for a little naughty play and think a romp with your vibrator is just what the doctor ordered. Now, if only the walls in the tiny apartment you share with your roommates weren’t so darned thin!

A vibrator equipped with a powerful but whisper-quiet motor could mean never again having to wait for everyone else in your household to go to bed before you can enjoy a few good vibrations from your favorite toys. Imagine the possibilities! Not only can you get down and dirty in your bedroom whenever you feel like it, but you can take your vibe into the shower or tub with you in the mornings without a second thought.

Help a toy-shy partner get into things more easily.

Sex toys aren’t just for enjoying on your own anymore. Bringing your trusty vibrator into the bedroom to enjoy with your partner is a good idea for lots of reasons. It takes the guesswork out of robust, toe-curling orgasms for both parties, as well as introduces lots of exciting new sensations to the mix. A partner who’s new to playing with toys may need time to get used to things, though, and a loud motor isn’t very helpful in this regard.

A whisper-quiet vibe adds all the oomph you could want to your play, but without a lot of extraneous noise that could kill the mood. Instead, you can simply focus on how good the stimulation feels, as well as the sweet sounds of your lover’s passion.

Take the struggle out of traveling.

If you travel a lot for either business or pleasure, then naturally, your vibrator of choice needs to be well suited for taking on the go. Portable sizes are a must. A discreet shape that doesn’t make it immediately apparent that your vibrator is what it is doesn’t hurt either. A quiet motor rounds things out perfectly for an unparalleled pleasure experience that’s 100 percent go-worthy.

Imagine the possibilities. A vibrator no one nearby can hear means you can enjoy your next orgasm without anyone being the wiser. Enjoy a quick refresher anywhere from your motel room, to a cruise cabin, to an airplane bathroom. The only sounds you’ll need to worry about stifling are your own moans of pleasure.

Get genuinely creative with your play sessions.

Do you love looking for new places to get down and dirty, either by yourself or with a partner? Have you ever found yourself thinking a particular experience would have been so much better if you’d added a vibrator to the mix? Upgrade your go-to toy to a whisper-quiet vibrator, and the only limits on how you can play will be the ones set by your imagination.

A quiet enough vibrator lets you add some extra intensity to all kinds of illicit encounters. Choose a portable vibrator style like a bullet and stow it away in your purse or your glove compartment, so it’s always available with it’s needed. Treat yourself to a little impromptu tension release when you need it. Whip it out as part of a sweet, naughty surprise to elevate your next backseat love session with a date. The right vibrator means anything goes.

Stay sane during quarantine.

Quarantine has found even those of us who typically have more room to ourselves living in closer quarters than usual with family members of all ages. Think spouses that are now working from home indefinitely, children attending classes over Zoom, and elderly family members co-quarantining with non-disabled adults to take the guesswork out of daily tasks!

In other words, you might well have suddenly found yourself without the kind of personal space you’re used to. Upgrading to a quieter vibrator can help you keep your sanity intact by ensuring your next orgasm isn’t dependent on getting everyone else out of the house at the same time.

Take the difference for a spin today with a powerful, discreet luxury vibrator from a top manufacturer like FemmeFunn. You’ll love what it does for your intimate life on every level.

How to Master the Art of Playing Hard to Get

Playing hard to get is something just about everyone has been told to do when they want someone in particular to look their way. It’s not always clear what that means though. Figuring out how to do it right is even tougher to figure out, but it’s well worth your while to learn anyway.

When it’s done right, playing hard to get works like a charm for one simple reason. Whether they know it or not, people like to feel they’ve worked for what they have and that includes relationships or meaningful encounters with other people. There are even numerous studies out there that back up the theory that playing hard to get works. Here’s how to get it right.

Draw Things Out When It Comes to Sex

Sure, there’s nothing quite like a super-hot one-night stand when you’re looking to scratch that familiar itch. However, there’s a lot to be said for letting the sexual tension build over time and simmer on the back burner for a while, even if you’re ultimately only interested in something casual with the person.

Spend a little time getting to know each other – your likes and dislikes, your turn-ons and turn-offs. Fan the flames a little. You’ll enjoy the anticipation and waiting will give them something to look forward to. When you do finally have sex, don’t let it become part of your routine together right away either. Treat it like a special treat instead.

Don’t Shower Them With Attention

When you like someone, it probably feels like the most natural thing in the world to give them what they want. If they’re smitten with you, they want you all over them and you probably want to be all over them… but that’s not exactly playing hard to get. Resist that urge at all costs, but without swinging to the opposite extreme.

Yes, you’ll give the person your attention. You’ll flirt with them and you’ll share your little electric moments. However, the trick is to give them just enough attention to keep them interested and wanting more, but not so much they’re getting everything they want. Remember, successfully playing hard to get is about making the person work for it a little.

Don’t Be an Open Book Either

Everyone has a friend who’s in the habit of telling every potential partner their entire life story, usually within the first couple of dates. It’s hardly uncommon for people like that to have trouble landing more dates after that point and the reason why is obvious. No one wants to be flooded with information about someone the minute they start getting to know them.

A little mystery, on the other hand, goes a very long way. Yes, tell the person about yourself, but give just a little bit at a time. Let the person have the fun of wondering about you and getting to know you slowly, one nugget of information at a time. You should certainly save the truly personal things for later on in your relationship.

Maintain a Space of Your Own

People who are great at playing hard to get truly value their independence. They like seeing and talking to another person they might be interested in, but they’re not keen on being around someone 24/7. They’re especially protective of their living spaces and other aspects of their personal lives.

The idea is to let this person know you want them, but also to make it clear that you don’t need them to feel happy and fulfilled. Spend time alone doing the things you like to do and have your friends or family over as often as you normally would. If you do have the person over to your place, set clear boundaries and limit the amount of time they spend there. Letting them make themselves at home where you live is the polar opposite of playing hard to get.

Show You’re in Demand

Social proof is a very powerful thing when it comes to making someone want something. Again, people want what they can’t have, especially if they can see everyone else wants it too. Show them your time is valuable and that your life is full of other people who want to be part of it.

Go out with your friends. Have fun on the weekends. Continue to fill your free time with activities that you love. Do get together with the object of your affection when you feel like it. Don’t skip your workouts, nights out with your squad, or anything else you have going on to spend time with them.

Play your cards right, be patient, and it won’t be long before you find out just how well playing hard to get works when it comes to grabbing and holding someone’s interest. It’s all about playing the game the right way.

5 Simple Tips for Boosting Your Body Confidence Quotient

Everyone occasionally struggles with their body image, but it’s important not to normalize negative self-talk or to let criticizing your body become a habit. Cultivating a positive, confident attitude toward your body instead is too beneficial to miss out on. It lowers your likelihood of developing mental health issues like depression and anxiety. Body confidence leads to happier, stronger relationships overall as well, including the one you have with yourself.

The following tips can help you start breaking bad body-image habits and replace them with healthy, nurturing new ones. Which ones will you start with first? How do you like to keep negative thoughts and feelings about your body at bay?

1.      Fall in Love with Exercise

If you think of exercise as nothing more than a way to conform to narrow social standards about what your body should look, it’s officially time to think again. Regular exercise is an important part of staying healthy and taking care of your body on every level, including mentally and emotionally. It’s also something that deserves to be enjoyed, as opposed to treated as a punishment for eating too many doughnuts.

Any activity that gets you up and moving counts as exercise, so choose something you genuinely enjoy. Yes, you’ll love how toned exercise makes you look, but you’ll also find yourself celebrating everything your body can do before too long.

2.      Limit Social Media Use

If you could swear scrolling through your feeds on Facebook or Instagram makes you feel worse about yourself, it’s not your imagination. The endless parade of vacation photos, perfect selfies, and humblebrags can easily give onlookers the impression that they’re the only ones out there who aren’t completely satisfied with their lives or their looks.

Keep in mind that other people’s pages are carefully curated highlight reels, so you’re only seeing what they want you to see. (Facetune and Photoshop make it even easier to make life seem perfect when it’s anything but.) Limit your screen time to make staying in touch with reality easier. Fill your feeds with people, brands, and accounts that inspire you, as opposed to bringing you down.

3.      Take Control of Your Pleasure

Not feeling as body-confident as you’d like can affect your ability to enjoy intimacy with a partner. If you’re busy worrying about how your body moves or your O-face looks, you’re not getting lost in how pleasurable the experience is. The same thing can happen if you’re too focused on your partner’s pleasure at the expense of your own.

A great way to cultivate a better relationship with your body is to learn how to please it. Treat yourself to a fantastic new luxury sex toy and put it through its paces. Learning what types of stimulation feel the best to your body helps you enjoy partnered sex more. You’ll become a more passionate, less inhibited lover as well. It’s hard not to fall madly in love with your body under circumstances like those.

4.      Upgrade Your Look

When you aren’t happy with your body, it’s all too easy to let your look go stale over the years. You get into the habit of wearing shapeless, nondescript things to hide your figure and trying your hardest to blend in instead of standing out. It’s easy to forget how much fun expressing yourself through your looks can be.

You don’t have to wear a size two to treat yourself to clothing that makes you look good and feel good. Breathe new life into your wardrobe by getting rid of anything that doesn’t fit, doesn’t make you look good, or isn’t “you” anymore. Replace those things with stylish, contemporary new clothes that are not only comfortable but make you look your best.

5.      Focus on the Positive

Life is about so much more than what you look like. It’s also way too short not to spend it appreciating everything that makes it awesome. Make a list of all the things you like about yourself and love about your life. Hang it up somewhere you’ll see it often and be reminded to keep things in perspective. Actively work on replacing negative self-talk with positive affirmations as well.

It’s OK if you have to fake it at first. Thinking more positively will likely become second nature given enough time and practice. If not, there’s no shame in asking a counselor for additional help. Sometimes body image issues have underlying causes that need to be addressed before you can get where you want to be.

At the end of the day, all bodies are beautiful, capable, and worthy of being appreciated. Yours is no exception, so take steps to love it a little more sooner rather than later. You’ll be glad you did.

5 Adventurous Sex Ideas Best Approached with Caution

While movies, television, and popular culture can be great sources of inspiration when it comes to your bedroom repertoire, some adventurous sex ideas translate into real life a lot better than others. There’s no need to remove them from your sexual bucket list just yet though. Just think them through thoroughly before you try them for best results.

1.      Having a One-Nighter

When you’re happily single or in between relationships, casual sex can be a terrific way to scratch that all-too-familiar itch without taking on a commitment you’re not ready for. If you’re new to going casual though, don’t just impulsively have a one-night stand on a whim. As sexy as they sound, one-nighters aren’t for everyone.

Have a one-nighter because the idea of casual sex sounds truly exciting to you. Don’t do it just to prove a point to yourself or someone else. Be prepared to be responsible about your sexual health as well. Don’t simply hope the other person will have protection on hand. Always carry your own on you and insist on using it.

2.      Getting Naughty in Public

If you’ve ever considered getting down and dirty with your partner (or even yourself) in public, you’re far from alone. Most people have at least fantasized about it at one time or another, but there’s a fine art to actually getting away with it. People can and do wind up with lasting sex offender records for public sex, so you don’t want to get caught.

The good news is you don’t have to get naughty in a super-conspicuous location to experience the rush public sex can bring to the table. Pick a place and time that carries a low risk of being spotted, like your enclosed back yard or patio late at night or early in the morning when your neighbors are almost surely in bed.

3.      Sexting

If it feels like most of your friends are into sexting these days, it’s probably because they are. It’s estimated that around half of all people at least occasionally use their trusty smartphones to send naughty IMs, spicy text, and even racy nudes. Sexting can be super-hot, not to mention a great way to keep sparks flying between you and someone special when you’re apart, but it’s always a good idea to proceed with caution any time you’re sending intimate information or images.

While it might not be the most adventurous sex idea, always consider the possible consequences if you accidentally sent a naughty text to the wrong person or it otherwise fell into the wrong hands. One person’s “a little embarrassing” could easily be another’s “life-ruining”, so choose your sexting partners with care as well. Unless you’re completely unbothered by the idea of your sexts or nudes possibly being shared around, it might be best to limit sexting to a long-time partner or really close friend-with-benefits.

4.      Indulging in a Three-Way

Like public sex, threesomes are common fantasy fuel for millions of people. Just don’t let the movies fool you into thinking they’re best experienced spontaneously in the heat of the moment. A threesome can be a wonderful way to experiment and push your sexual boundaries, but you may be putting your relationship at risk if you don’t thoroughly plan and discuss things first.

Make sure this is something you both want to do, because it’s sure to spell trouble for your relationship otherwise. Go over things like what’s off-limits for each of you and how you each want the event to go down. Choose a partner together. Agree that either of you can simply shut down what’s going on at any time if you’re uncomfortable as well.

5.      Shower Sex

As adventurous sex ideas goes, shower sex is unlikely to carry harmful repercussions for your relationship or social life if things don’t go as planned, it can find someone getting hurt if you’re not careful enough. Keep in mind that most showers mean working within pretty close quarters, so it’s a good idea to be limber enough to make it work. Don’t let the hot, wet circumstances cause a bad fall or any unfortunate slipping either.

Add some traction to the floor of your tub with some well-placed appliques or a removable grip mat. Handrails in strategic places can be real godsends as well. (Just make sure they’re securely installed.) Last but not least, double check that any adult toys you’d like to add to the mix are fully waterproof and that all seals are intact before bringing them along for the ride.

Although the movies never make it seem that way, a little planning and preparedness are the keys to outside-the-box thinking that takes adventurous sex over the top. Put it into play for yourself the next time you’re thinking of mixing things up!

Is My Sex Life Really Healthy and Normal?

It’s something everyone wonders from time to time (and a lot more often than you think) – how their sex life stacks up against the average person’s. They wonder whether they’re too obsessed with sex, whether there’s enough of it in their relationship, and whether or not their preferences are normal. Like everyone, people know they want a sex life that’s healthy, happy, and in line with the norm. What they don’t know is what that would actually look like. Here are a few indicators to keep in mind.

Both Partners Are Comfortable and Satisfied

At the end of the day, there’s no magic number of times you and your partner have to be doing it for your sex life together to be considered healthy. There’s no benchmark you need to meet in order to be considered “adventurous enough” either. Just think about your answers to the following questions.

  • Do both of you feel your needs are being met?
  • Do both of you feel you try enough new things and enjoy the things you do try?
  • Does the quality and frequency of the sex in your relationship feel like enough to both of you?
  • Does each of you give and receive as needed and desired in the bedroom?

If you can answer an honest “yes” to each of those questions, then it’s safe to say that your sex life is normal, happy, and healthy. Everyone’s ideal is different. Some couples are happiest when they’re swinging from the chandeliers every night and going to sex clubs on the weekends, but that hardly means there’s something wrong with couples who aren’t into that. Ultimately, “healthy” is about what feels exciting, fulfilling, and satisfying to you.

Neither Partner Feels Pressured, Judged, or Pushed

There’s no room in a happy, healthy sexual relationship for abuse or pressure of any kind when it comes to sex. Never at any time does someone have the right to say or imply that their partner is inadequate in any way. No one should ever be told that they ought to be “different” in bed or find themselves compared to past partners.  Neither partner should ever feel required to participate in any sex act that makes them uncomfortable or uneasy either.

Healthy, happy couples see the bedroom they share as a safe space where they’re free to be themselves sexually. Yes, they want to enjoy themselves, but not at their partner’s expense. They understand that sex should be mutually fulfilling – a way for them to grow closer together in their respect, intimacy, and love for one another. Sex should never be used a way to control, abuse, shame, or punish one another.

Communication Is Frequent and Free-Flowing

Communication is an essential part of any relationship, both in and out of the bedroom. Without it, there’s no real way to know for sure whether the other person is happy with the way things are, so it needs to be happening comfortably and often. Healthy, happy sexual relationships involve people who can:

  • Speak freely and frankly about sex on every level.
  • Discuss fantasies without fear of judgment, up to and including the possibility of bringing them to life (or not).
  • Speak up regarding things they don’t like, trusting that they’ll be heard.
  • Bring up suggestions as to things they’d like to try or explore together.
  • Ask for what they truly need in bed, secure in the knowledge that their partner genuinely wants to know.

If you and your partner can do all of the above, it’s pretty safe to say that the two of you have a healthy, happy sex life.

Both Partners Are Curious and Willing to Explore

While it’s fine to be happy with your sex life and to feel all of your needs are being met, it’s important not to get stuck in a rut. A willingness to try new things and explore from time to time is a sign that not only is your sex life stable, but thriving and growing as well. Experimentation keeps things from getting stale, keeps the two of you connected, and ensures the energy between you remains electric.

Again, there’s no right or wrong way to experiment in the bedroom. You ultimately set the limits and decide what goes, so explore within the boundaries the two of you are comfortable with. Try some new positions on for size, or switch things up when it comes to location. Start a toy chest and fill it with options that you shop for together. Take turns suggesting new sensations or techniques you’d like to explore together as well.

At the end of the day, there’s no right or wrong way to run your sex life, and no two couples are ever going to be alike. If you’re both happy and satisfied, you can rest easy in the knowledge that your sex life is healthy.

How to Get in Touch with Your Inner Sex Kitten

Knowing you’d like to be more confident, both in and out of the bedroom, is easy. It’s getting in touch with that confidence and making it feel natural that’s really challenging. That said, have you always longed to be a more effortlessly sexual person? Would you like to be the sort of woman who’s unabashedly comfortable in her own skin? It’s simpler than you probably think.

That brand of raw sexuality that seems to flow so naturally for some people has a lot less to do with actual sex than you think. Sure, being comfortable with the idea of wearing a strap-on or dominating a partner like a boss can be sexy in its own way. However, it has a lot more to do with self-love and self-acceptance. Thankfully, these are qualities you can learn to cultivate with time and patience.

It Has to Be About You

Wanting to grow into a more primal version of yourself is admirable, but it’s important to do it for the right reasons. That said, what are your reasons for wanting to be more outwardly sexual? Is this something a partner pressured you into feeling you need to do in order to be more acceptable to them, or is it something you want to do for yourself?

Ultimately, channeling your inner sex kitten is about learning to love and appreciate yourself. Sexy, confident women don’t worry about whether they’re enough for their partners. They simply focus on being the best possible versions of themselves, resting easy in the knowledge that the right partner will appreciate that authenticity.

Address Any Underlying Issues

A person’s sexuality and sex drive can be pretty complex, so you’ll definitely want to ask yourself why you’re having trouble being as sexual as you want to be. Is it simply a confidence issue, or are there underlying medical or physical issues at work as well? If you struggle with a lack of desire or low sex drive, and you’re not sure why, consider asking a doctor about underlying issues that might be at play. You might be surprised how much it helps.

Taking good care of yourself physically is also key when it comes to maintaining a happy, healthy sex life. Nourish yourself with wholesome foods, move around as much as possible, keep stress to a minimum, and practice healthy self-care. When you’re good to the body you’re in, it’s easier to build a relationship with it and ultimately learn to love it more.

Communicate with Your Partner

If you’re in a relationship or otherwise have a regular sex partner, bringing them on board with what you’re trying to do will be really helpful. Let them know you’re working on becoming more confident and ask them to support you in your efforts however they can. If there’s something specific you need from them, let them know what that is. If your partner truly cares about you as they should, they’ll be happy to help any way they can.

You’ll also want to spend as much quality time as possible with your partner. Intimacy and chemistry in the bedroom go hand in hand with connection everywhere else. Foster a deeper connection as far as your relationship goes in general, and you might be surprised how quickly your inner sex kitten comes out.

Learn What You Like

Far too many women have little to no idea what they really enjoy sexually, because they wrongly think sex has to involve someone else in order to be worthwhile. Connecting with a partner in the bedroom is great, but sexually confident women know how to appreciate pleasure for its own sake all on their own as well. If you’re not in the habit of masturbating on your own, it’s officially time to start.

Pick a private, quiet place where you won’t be interrupted and simply enjoy the process of exploring your body. Experiment with different types of touch and stimulation. Invest in a couple good quality sex toys that appeal to you, and practice bringing yourself to orgasm in different ways. Exploring different types of porn or erotica can be a wonderful way to discover new turn-ons (and turn-offs) as well. The more you know about yourself sexually, the easier it will be to let your inner sex kitten off the leash more often.

Define Sexy for Yourself

Last but definitely not least, decide what sexy looks like and feels like to you, and cultivate that aesthetic. Maybe the epitome of feminine sex appeal to you really is do-me pumps, tight dresses, and lots of red lipstick. If that’s the case, that’s great, but sexy can just as easily look like jeans, a white t-shirt, and a freshly scrubbed face.

At the end of the day, you need to be able to look in the mirror and see someone you think is sexy looking back at you. Once you can do that, the rest is easy. Are you ready to get started?

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