Orgasms 101: Everything You Need to Know for Better Orgasms

While there’s no such thing as a bad orgasm, even a good thing can always be a little bit better. You deserve toe-curling, life-changing orgasms, and they’re easier to achieve than you think. All it takes is a little know-how and some fun experimentation.

If you've been asking yourself how to have a better orgasm, you're in the right place. We'll go over everything you need to know to start having the crazy-intense pleasure you've been fantasizing about, either on your own or with a partner.

1. Do your Kegels for stronger orgasms

Your sex life has a lot in common with your other physical activities — it’s exercise. That means it pays to get yourself into fighting shape. We’re talking about Kegels, the exercises designed to strengthen your pelvic floor muscles. The stronger these muscles become, the more intensely they’ll contract when you go over the edge, leading to stronger orgasms.

To do one, simply contract the same muscles you’d use to stop your urine stream, hold for 3-5 seconds, and release. For best results, do three sets of ten reps throughout your day. When you’re ready, you can make things more challenging by adding a set of Kegel balls to your routine.

2. Use sex toys to intensify your orgasm

As anyone who’s ever owned a vibrator can tell you, sex toys can be a game-changer for your orgasm quality. Playing with toys is a great way to experiment with different sensations.

For a more intense orgasm, try "edging." Bring yourself to the brink of orgasm using a toy, but hold off right before you go over. Repeat this a few times. When you finally let go, the release will be massive. If you want to multitask, adding a vibrating kegel ball like the Momenta can stimulate you internally while helping you build that pelvic floor strength.

Playing with a partner? Introducing couples vibrators is one of the best ways to synchronize your pleasure. These toys are designed to stimulate both partners simultaneously, creating a feedback loop of sensation that often leads to more explosive finales.

Never underestimate the power of a good lube, either. It’s a common misconception that lube is only for when you’re not wet enough. In reality, lube makes everything better for everyone, every time. It heightens sensation and makes every touch feel incredible.

3. Set the right temperature

It’s hard to let go and have a mind-blowing orgasm if you’re shivering. Being warm and comfortable is a major factor in relaxation, which is essential for pleasure. While an old, misinterpreted study from 2005 claimed socks were the key, the study's author later confirmed this was misleading, and the real takeaway is simpler: being cold is a distraction.

The goal is to eliminate those distractions and focus completely on pleasure. Try getting it on after a warm bubble bath or have your partner give you a sensual massage with a heating oil during foreplay. And yes, if your feet get cold, there’s no shame in wearing a pair of socks to bed. It's all about what makes you feel comfortable and relaxed.

4. Explore all your erogenous zones

You already know how important the clitoris and the G-spot are when it comes to achieving powerful orgasms. If that’s where your efforts stop, however, there’s a chance your orgasms still aren’t as intense as they could be. Your body is full of erogenous zones that are well worth getting to know a little better.

Try starting with a little nipple action. Not only does nipple stimulation release the feel-good hormone oxytocin, but some women are actually able to reach orgasm from that alone. Check out our guide to breast play ideas to master this technique. Stimulation for your nerve-rich anal area is also worth exploring as a way to intensify your orgasm or help you get there faster.

Feel free to explore to your heart’s content. Many women find being touched, kissed, or otherwise stimulated on their inner thighs, ears, stomachs, or necks to be a great way to pursue or amplify their orgasms as well.

5. Get in the right headspace

A woman’s mind is arguably her most important (and overlooked) erogenous zone, so keep this in mind while chasing the perfect orgasm. An emotional connection to a partner definitely helps, but you may want to try these ideas as well:

• Take a little time before your rendezvous to relax, unwind, and clear your mind. Meditation works wonders, but so does a nice bubble bath or a peaceful walk.
• Read a little erotica, watch some sensual porn, or listen to some music you find sexy to prepare for the upcoming festivities.
• Have your partner treat you to a romantic, sensual massage complete with scented massage oil, candles, and the whole nine yards. (Feel free to return the favor if you’re in the mood, too.)
• Don’t underestimate how powerful fantasy can be. If you know you’ll be getting down and dirty later, spend some time during the day fantasizing about your partner or about something extra sexy you’re hoping to try soon. It’s like foreplay for your mind.

6. Engage all your senses

Sensation play is a wonderful way to prepare your body for next-level orgasms. It activates underutilized nerve endings and lets you experiment with different types of arousal. Try heightening your sense of touch by wearing a sexy blindfold while your lover uses a feather tickler on you. If you enjoy light impact, a playful spanking can awaken nerve endings.

Temperature play is another great option. While ice cubes are a classic choice, using specialized toys from our Bougie collection takes it to the next level. These glass and metal toys can be warmed in water or cooled in the fridge, offering a sleek, safe way to experiment with hot and cold sensations on your skin.

Learning how to have a better orgasm is a journey of self-discovery and fun. By strengthening your body, exploring with toys, and getting in the right headspace, you can take your pleasure to a whole new level. The only question is, where will you start?

FAQ: How to have better orgasms