5 Great Ways to Get Hot and Bothered (That Aren’t Porn)

Naturally, sex – solo or otherwise – is best when you’re as aroused as possible, but sometimes everyone needs a little help getting to that place. A quick porn clip or two is the usual go-to when it comes right down to it, but even the hottest porn can get stale after a while. It’s also not for everyone or the right fit for every situation.

Thankfully, porn’s not the only option under the sun when it comes to getting hot and bothered in an instant. Here are a few alternatives to try if porn isn’t really your jam or for times when you’re just in the mood for something different.

1.      Try reading some erotica.

If classic porn doesn’t do it for you or you just want a new way to get excited, written erotica makes for a great alternative. It’s also the type of thing many people enjoy just about any time, whether you’re looking to get aroused right that second or not.

There’s so much out there to choose from, including red hot short fiction you can get through in a few minutes to complete erotic novels that provide a more extended, richer experience. Try a few different formats on for size until you figure out what you like most.

2.      Hang out in a chat room.

Not everyone gets super turned on just by watching other people get hot and heavy with one another. Some people really crave something interactive that lets them play a part in what’s going on, so to speak. Chat rooms may seem old school, but they’re definitely still out there and can be a lot of fun.

Some chat sites match you randomly with someone who could be located anywhere in the world. Others let you make more targeted choices. All come without the pressure of having to think about meeting in real life. Instead, you can just enjoy one another for a few moments and then move on with your life.

3.      Write about your fantasies.

If you enjoy journaling or any other form of writing, you might find you enjoy writing about your fantasies. The process can be incredibly arousing, as well as an effective way to get better acquainted with some of the things that turn you on. You wouldn’t be the first person who discovered a new kink or pet fantasy via a little creative writing.

Consider starting an erotic journal for your eyes only to record sexy dreams, explore pet fantasies, and more. Later on, if you decide you’re comfortable, you may want to consider sharing some of what you’ve written with a partner or at least bringing up some of the fantasies for discussion.

4.      Enjoy some ultra-indulgent tub time.

Sometimes it’s not a lack of stimulation that’s getting in the way of deep arousal. If you’re always busy or struggling to keep up with a packed schedule, what you may really need is some time spent unwinding. A long, hot soak in the tub may be just the thing to do with a free evening sometime soon.

Make sure you go the whole nine yards and include everything you enjoy. Use luxury bath oil or bubble bath in a heady, luscious scent you love. Play your favorite music and pour yourself a glass of wine. Relax, unwind, and let your mind wander. If you like, you can even bring your favorite waterproof toy along for the ride in case you find yourself in the mood.

5.      Partake in some steamy talk with your partner.

If you’re not shy about initiating some spicy conversation with your partner, it can be a great way to get in the mood and make sex extra hot. Start by whispering a little something in their ear after kissing them goodbye in the morning. Then keep the conversation going all day long while you’re apart over text or instant message.

How sexy you get is up to the two of you, but the naughtier, the better. Type out something titillating you’d like to try together later. Send them a smoking hot selfie that reveals a little peek of your lingerie of the day or otherwise gives your partner something to look forward to when it’s time to come back together at the end of the day. Being aroused enough won’t be a problem for either of you.

There’s no one right way to jumpstart your libido and get in the mood. Porn may feel like it’s everyone else’s go-to method, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it has to be yours. And, of course, you can and should switch things up as often and as thoroughly as you like. Try a few new options on for size, and see what works for you!