If you’re sexually active, then it’s probably pretty safe to assume you hope you’re good in bed. After all, everyone wants to be the kind of person who leaves a lover hungry for more and stays on a person’s mind long after an encounter is over. There are many people out there who aren’t so hot at sex, though, and it’s not like most partners are going to tell someone if that’s the case.
So, how can you tell whether you’re really the sexual dynamo you hope you are? It’s easier than you think. You just have to know how to go about looking for answers. Here’s a closer look at how you can tell whether you’re knocking it out of the park in the bedroom in general.
You’re super confident.
This is one thing every person who’s excellent in bed has in common. They’re confident to the bone. They also know that being great in bed isn’t necessarily about having a flawless gym body or being model-gorgeous. It’s about never second-guessing yourself and always going into sex, assuming you’re going to be awesome.
The interesting thing about confidence is that when you believe in your own abilities, other people tend to believe in them, too. Work on your body image and any hang-ups you may have about your physique or about sex. Cultivate a healthy sense of self-love. You’ll be where you want to be before you know it.
You’re a great communicator.
People who are good in bed genuinely enjoy sex. They love establishing that connection with another person, and they can’t get enough of how good sex feels. They not only know what they like in bed, but they’re comfortable communicating it to their partner. They understand that excellent communication is a two-way street, as well, so they’re just as terrific at listening to their lovers.
If you don’t already know your way around your body and understand what types of stimulation bring you the most pleasure, it’s time to find out. Buy an outstanding quality vibrator, and spend some time experimenting. Then get vocal and let your partner know exactly how you like it.
You love everything about sex from start to finish.
As incredible as a seriously toe-curling orgasm can be, great sex is about more than just that big finish. People who are great in bed savor every step of the journey along the way. They love the tension that comes with craving someone and flirting up a storm. They love undressing themselves and their lover. They love basking in the glow of the things they’ve just done when it’s all over, as well.
People who are great lays aren’t in any rush to reach the finish line. They take their time and appreciate every little grunt, groan, caress, and kiss along the way. They like long, lush marathon love sessions, quickies, and everything in between, as well.
You love making your partner feel good.
While enjoying sex yourself and making sure you walk away satisfied is essential, so is paying attention to your partner. People who are fantastic in bed go out of their way to learn what does it for the other person. They also understand that no two people or bodies are exactly alike, so they don’t simply assume that what worked for their ex will get the job done for someone new.
Great sex partners are also respectful of their partners’ boundaries. They care about the other person’s feelings and are loving and patient. They’re considerate when they’re not in the mood or just not into something new they may have tried. They never force the issue or try to pressure someone into doing something they don’t want.
You’re open to trying new things.
People who are good in bed are masters of variety, and they know how important it is to keep things fresh in the bedroom. They’re always open to trying new things or thinking outside the box, whether that means exploring lots of new positions, roleplaying, or trying out new sex toys together every once in a while.
Sexual dynamos don’t just love sex. They’re curious about it and always looking for ways to make it even better. So, don’t let yourself get set in your ways and stick with the same old things just because they work. Share fantasies with your partner and encourage them to share, as well. Alternate between planning for luxurious love sessions and being spontaneous. Experiment with new positions, locations, and techniques.
Although it’s never possible to be 100 percent certain that you’re great in bed, especially when “good in bed” is such a relative concept anyway, you’re on the right track if you’re genuinely in love with sex. Never stop looking for ways to love it even more. You’ll be better for it.