Thankfully, a lot has changed about how people view and use sex toys since our parents were young. Instead of being seen as a lesser substitute for a sexual relationship with another person, using and owning a sex toy is now thought of as an empowering way to take ownership of your own sexuality. Sex toys aren’t just for women anymore either. Men and couples are making them part of their sexual routines as well.

For that reason, there are now more options out there to choose from than ever, making it quite the challenge to settle on the right toy for you, especially if you’re shopping for your very first toy. Here we’ll go over everything you need to know to make a decision you’ll be happy with for some time to come.

Do I Really Need a Sex Toy?

An adult toy is to your sex life what dessert is to a meal. It’s technically not essential. You may not even be in the mood to partake every single time you feel like enjoying yourself. It sure is pleasant when you do though! Popular sex toys aren’t replacements for a sexual relationship with your partner or even with yourself. They’re cleverly designed ways to enhance and elevate something that’s already great on its own.

New sex toys can also be awesome ways to get to know yourself or a partner sexually. Having trouble reaching orgasm either on your own or when you’re with someone else? Looking to explore some fun new sensations you’ve never experimented with before? Ready to take control of your pleasure and make your sex life everything you’ve always wanted it to be? Sex toys can help you with all of those things.

Know Your Sex Toys

If you’ve never been to a online adult toy store like FemmeFunn that sells sex toys, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed by all the choices you have. Most sex toys tend to fall into one of six basic categories though. They are as follows.

1. Vibrators: Perhaps the most popular type of sex toy, vibrators bring you pleasure via intense, targeted vibrations. Some vibrators are insertive, while others are meant to target other pleasure centers like the clitoris or your back door. There are mutual use vibrators made for couples to consider as well. 

2. Dildos: Dildos are insertive toys that are phallic in nature. Some are designed to look and feel like erect penises while others are less representational. Many dildos can be used on their own or added to a harness for partnered play. 

3. Nipple Toys: Nipple toys are designed to stimulate and activate the sensitive nerve endings in the nipples. Clamps are a popular type of nipple toy for sure, but there are also nipple toys that incorporate suction or even electrostimulation into the mix. 

4. Sexercise Toys: This category includes toys like Kegel balls. They’re options that can definitely be pleasurable to use or wear in and of themselves, but that also enhance your ability to have phenomenal sex with your partner. 

5. Cock Rings: The most basic cock rings are flexible silicone rings designed to be worn around the erect penis to maintain an erection. Cock rings are also prized for their ability to help a man last and achieve larger, harder erections than he might otherwise. Some cock rings come equipped with tiny vibrators to enhance intercourse for both partners. 

6. Strokers: Strokers are male sex toys that are most often used as masturbation aids. At their simplest, they’re textured silicone or rubber sleeves that can greatly enhance a hand job. However, there are strokers that vibrate, pulsate, apply suction, mimic the look or feel of various openings, and more.

What to Consider

Which of the above general options is right for you depends largely on what you’re hoping to gain by adding a fun new sex toy to your repertoire. Those looking to increase the frequency or intensity of their orgasms can hardly go wrong with a classic vibrator (for women) or a stroker (for men) as far as trying a first toy. Picks like couple’s vibrators or remote control sex toys are great picks for enhancing intercourse or foreplay. Keep the following tips in mind as you shop as well.

Start Simple

If you’ve never used a sex toy before, it’s best to start simple with something that can be put to multiple uses (e.g. a classic vibrator that can be inserted, used clitorally, used with a partner, and so forth). Once you’ve been using it a while, you’ll find you’ve discovered a thing or two as far as what feels good and how you like to use your toys.

Use those discoveries as a guideline to explore your next couple of items. Have you been wishing you could take your vibrating toy into the tub or shower on occasion? Go waterproof next time. Want a vibe capable of giving you blended orgasms? Upgrade your simpler vibe to a rabbit-style alternative. Have you discovered you like to use your toy to stimulate your back door? Look into different types of anal toys. You get the picture!

Start Small Too

Even if you’re all about size when it comes to your flesh and blood lovers, resist the urge to snap up the biggest dildo or vibrator you can find right off the bat. It’s easier than you think to wind up with something that’s really more toy than you can handle as an absolute beginner. There’s plenty of room to size up later on once you’re sure that’s what you really want and need.

Don’t Overlook Discreet Toys

One of the most common reservations people have when buying a first sex toy is the possibility of someone else seeing it or finding it. If that sounds like you, consider looking into a sex toy that’s smaller than you’d expect, discreetly designed to not look like a sex toy, or both.

Bullet vibrators are worth their weight in gold for the way they’re super versatile, not to mention portable. Not only do they work wonderfully for standard self-service purposes, but they’re easy to integrate into partnered play as well. Plus, you can easily stash them in your purse, nightstand, or pocket without anyone being the wiser.

There are small, clever vibes that are designed to be indistinguishable from everyday objects like lipstick, mascara, and so forth as well. There are also wand massagers that technically double as muscle massage options, so the only one that will know you have a sex toy is you.

Last but not least, you’ll want to give some thought to practical concerns like material. Hardy, versatile materials like plastic or silicone are not only affordable and durable, but easy to clean and take care of. Designer sex toys made of jelly rubber or specialized materials like RealSkin require special care in order to maintain their integrity over time, so keep this in mind as you shop.

At the end of the day, the best first sex toy for you is the one that’s best able to meet your needs. Start exploring the possibilities today! You’re sure to be left wondering why you didn’t take the plunge a whole lot sooner when you discover how well toys enhance your sex life.